11 Month Update

Dear Lana,

You are 11 months old today. You weigh a little over 20 lbs., stand over 29 inches tall, have two teeth with the promise of more any day now, and are 89 percent more likely to be causing mischief* than you were just a couple of months ago.

You’ve spent the majority of the last month crawling at a surprising pace from one room to the next, dismantling anything that can be taken apart, throwing anything that isn’t nailed down, and generally thwarting any attempts I make to keep the house clean and organized. Your messes are so grandiose that we have given them a special name: Lana Bombs. You leave Lana Bombs everywhere – in your room, the bathroom, our bedroom, the kitchen, and even the dining room (where we moved Rico’s bowls and created a special obstacle course in an effort to keep you away from them).

The kitchen, in particular, has become a favorite hangout for you. We cleared out an entire cabinet and filled it with Tupperware, spoons, pots, and other assorted kitchen gadgets for you to play with. You love emptying out the contents of that cabinet. You’ve also become fascinated with the refrigerator and have an amazing ability to wedge yourself into the door in the few seconds it takes to remove a drink. The last time you got in there you pulled yourself up to a stand, opened up a drawer, and began dumping grapes out on the floor. I took a break from saying, “No!” for long enough to snap a photo, because seeing you on your feet is such a thrill for me. Then it was right back to cleaning up the floor.

Fortunately, I get a nice break from cleaning the floor during meal times. The Cheerios and noodles you fling from your high chair are immediately consumed by Rico, who is most pleased by your move to solid foods. In fact, his diet has consisted of more Cheerios than Purina as of late. Between mealtimes, he follows you around waiting to see if food debris will fall off as you crawl, and rarely is he disappointed. Once, after returning from the Chick-fil-a breakfast buffet, he hit the jackpot when we discovered home fries tucked into your dress and bits of biscuit in your diaper. It was a good day for the dog.

Rico had a bad day last week when I discovered that you will now give me five upon command. In the midst of my raving and demonstrating your new skill to John, Rico wandered over with a sullen look. If he could talk I’m sure he would have said, “Look kid, high fives are kind of my thing. Maybe you could learn to play dead or something.”

You’ve also become a big pointer in the last month, stopping at various places throughout the house to point out pictures, wall hangings, and other décor. You seem particularly interested in artwork and have become enthralled with a painting in your room that I did to distract myself just days before your birth. On some occasions, however, your pointing has a more practical purpose. When a mylar balloon escaped to our vaulted ceiling on your Granny T’s watch, I came downstairs from my office to find you all out of sorts. Over and over you pointed to Granny and then to the balloon, your meaning quite plain: “You, woman. Get me back that balloon! Macht schnell!”**

Finally, I cannot complete an update of your eleventh month without mentioning your penchant for rolling your tongue. I posted video of it last week, but I failed to properly emphasize the frequency with which you do it. The purring has become your automatic response when anything makes you happy. A lot like a cat. It’s actually pretty cool because I really like cats but your father is allergic to them. Now if we could just get you housetrained…

Thanks for another wonderful and wacky month, my beautiful Lana Kat.

Love,
Mom

*Note that “causing mischief” is a baby-friendly translation for getting into shit. The latter is actually a better description of what you’ve been doing all month, but I’m trying not to be a potty mouth so I can blame any cussing you do in the future on the television or, better yet, your father.

**In my imagination, you speak German when you are angry. All the better for making your point, ja?