John’s Coworkers are Sneaky, Too

For a week or two after the ambush baby shower at Moe’s, I carried my camera in my purse and brushed my hair at least once a day so I could be ready for the next surprise. I had just begun to think that the only remaining surprise would be which body part will swell up and burst first (my money is on the ankles, but the fingers are keeping the race close), when I pulled up to the SunTrust building and found John standing on the side of the street with a Baby Papasan Swing (shown to the right), a Target gift card, and a piece of cake.

It turns out that John had his own little ambush baby shower, this time courtesy of the SunTrust loss prevention department. I don’t personally know John’s coworkers, but I know they are very kind and generous people who went way above and beyond with their gift to our growing family.

Nice gifts, delicious cake, and no need to brush my hair. It doesn’t get much better than that for a pregnant lady.

Affirmation

 

From TLC's Life Lessons:

"Just because you're a mom
doesn't mean you have to
wear mom jeans."

Extreme Reproduction

I was first introduced to the Duggar family by TLC during my third month of pregnancy. The Duggars have become famous because they are big-time breeders – 16 kids at last count. They live out in the countryside of what must be West Virginia (where else can you find a kid named Jebediah Duggar?) in a home that they began building themselves until TLC swooped in and finished the construction, decoration, and furnishing of the house.

The Duggars are apparently enjoying some more screen time, since I found the following message from my former friend, Clay, in my inbox this morning:

Have you seen that lunatic family on TLC called the Duggars? They are supposed to be building their own house and the mother is pregnant again. Either it is all an act and the lady is not really pregnant and those aren't her kids or you are a big wimp. She has 15 other kids that she takes care of and she is building her own house while pregnant. Have you built a house recently? That's what I thought. :)

Clay was also kind enough to supply a visual of what the Mayes family could one day look like, if only we apply ourselves to baby-making and embrace the fashions of our Puritan ancestors. It seems like the hairstyle I’m sporting in this photo would be effective birth control all by itself, but it clearly hasn’t deterred Papa Duggar.

The photo actually raises some interesting possibilities. TLC has created a whole line of programming around people who do normal, everyday things (having kids, eating, dressing and decorating poorly), but to the extreme. Perhaps my own dream home is just a case of manic, incessant tooth-brushing away.

I Could Get Used to This

Three baby showers in less than two weeks + the constant concern and attention of family and friends = one very spoiled Jennifer.

I suppose this is how a normal human being turns into Paris Hilton. People lavish enough attention and gifts on you and you start to believe that you've done something to deserve it. At least I’m receiving attention for carrying around a baby and not a Fendi handbag full of cash I didn’t earn, annoyingly tiny dogs, and the blood of my servants mixed into a delicious, low-carb frappuccino.

I also realize that my time in the spotlight is brief. As soon as Baby Girl is born I will be an afterthought -- the woman who feeds and cleans the baby and drives her to make appearances before her adoring public. With that in mind, I soaked up what is likely to be my final baby shower (unless I’m ambushed during lunch again). The shower was hosted by two very excited grandmothers-to-be, Teresa and Christine. I was once again overwhelmed by the care and planning that went into the shower, as well as the thoughtful gifts offered up by the shower guests.

I will never forget how special I’ve been made to feel during my pregnancy. I will cling to that memory every time I get knocked to the ground by a stampede of family and friends jockeying to see the baby.

View photos from the shower >

My Coworkers are Sneaky

John and I have a lunch date every Wednesday. This allows us to spend a little more time together during the week and it gives John a break from sack lunches and overpriced cafeteria chicken fingers. We rotate between three restaurants: Fellinis, Eats, and Moes (with a heavy emphasis on Moes).

The baby and I were in the mood for burritos today, and what the baby wants the baby gets. (You don’t mess with someone who has such easy access to important organs and bodily functions). As we pulled into the parking lot, I noticed the cars of a couple of coworkers. This should have clued me in to the coming surprise, but I just considered it a coincidence and expected to find Jane and Sabrina picking up lunch together. Instead, I walked in and found every member of the Genex Atlanta office sitting at a big table with a mound of gifts in the center and yelling, “Surprise!”

Even more touching than the amazing gifts (the Graco Metrolite Travel System and Velboa Snuzzler, pictured, and a Sony baby monitor) was the amount of effort that went into pulling off the surprise. It turns out that John was in on it from the start, subtly manipulating me into showing up at the right place and right time through a fake post-lunch meeting and even a sudden urge for Eats the previous week. In the meantime, everyone in my office made a mad dash for Moes just minutes after I left to pick up John, which is especially impressive since it normally takes a full hour to organize the group and get them moving for a lunch outing.

Thanks for the wonderful surprise, Genexers – this totally makes up for all the fat jokes.

Baby Shower

I am incredibly touched by the support that John and I have received from our family and friends as we prepare for our new baby. My cousin and aunt today hosted a lovely baby shower for me, complete with a made-from-scratch diaper cake centerpiece and a personal gift-opening assistant (Madeleine, shown hard at work to the left).

We received many wonderful gifts and, more importantly, found out that a lot of people care about our growing family. Thank you to all who attended for your kindness and generosity, and thanks especially to Shirley and Syble for making it such a special occasion.

More photos from the shower >>

8 Month Update

Dear Baby Girl,

Today marks our eight-month anniversary of living together and I think you are becoming dissatisfied with your current quarters. My belly is now like an episode of MTV’s The Real World – we’re finding out what happens when you and my organs stop being polite and start getting real. To be fair, you are now almost four pounds and 17 inches long, which means that you totally deserve more space than those annoying kidneys and that boring bladder.

According to BabyCenter.com, side effects of my growing belly are low back pain and pain in my buttocks and thighs. That means I can say you have literally become a pain in my ass without being a bad mom – I’m just stating a scientific fact.

The various growing pains are easy to forgive when I think of how much I’ve learned about you in the past few weeks. You become as impatient as Rico when dinner is being prepared and you have a serious affection for Dr. Pepper. You love it when your father talks to you, but you will not stand for being bossed or ordered to settle down. I can actually make out your tiny little feet when you kick me now, which is very, very often. You are feisty and independent already and I am so glad that you're mine.

Love,
Mom

Happy 4th of July

John and I enjoyed a long holiday weekend, possibly our last real break before the birth of our daughter. Between napping and watching the World Cup, Wimbledon, and the Tour de France, we squeezed in a successful attempt at babysitting my cousin’s two young children. We made it through an entire evening without any crying, fights, or injuries, and even earned a disappointed, “Oh, no!” from Madeleine when her parents returned home. John’s trademark babysitting technique is to chase the kids around the house until all parties are sweaty and exhausted. I think this may actually be a viable service for us to offer – a baby boot camp, of sorts. It will at least save our family some money on gym memberships in the future.

I have also reached the point where I am so clearly pregnant that strangers feel the need to ask me about my baby or share their little pearls of wisdom. Here are my favorite random remarks from the holiday weekend:

“This is what they look like at one-year old.” – Proud grandfather at neighborhood fireworks display.

“Just wait until they start drawing on each other.” – Frustrated father at Target with a young child and red-marker decorated baby.

“Your ankles don’t look that fat.” – Clay

“Did that seriously just happen?” – Jennifer to John, after spotting a large, lumpy mother walking out of Kroger with her family in nothing but a cropped t-shirt, shoes, and bikini bottom. I guess she was taking the shirt and shoes dress code requirement too literally.