Poop Dispenser

The baby books I read really didn’t do enough to prepare me for the poops of my newborn baby. Sure, they told me to keep a record of my child’s bowel movements and even provided some guidance as to the characteristics of the poop. After changing Lana’s diapers for the past five weeks, I think a checklist like the following is actually in order:

• Poop is yellow and watery. Check.



• Poop has noticeable odor. Check.



• Poop has tendency to seep out of diapers and onto clothes of baby and caregivers. Check.



• Poop can be shot out of baby’s bottom during a diaper change like a garden fountain and land more than two feet away from the changing table while mom stands by screaming. CHECK.