Troubleshooting, Georgia Power Style
After our power went out Saturday afternoon and stayed out for over 12 hours, we got a crash course in the three steps of troubleshooting from Georgia Power.
Step One: Ask the Obvious
The disgustingly friendly voice recording (I’ll call her Connie) that answered my call to report the outage asked a string of questions and attempted to mimic the response of a real, live person by saying things like, “Oh, I can help you with that.” Connie and I got along great until at the end of her script she asked me to confirm that all the lights were out in my house. I’m sure some idiot customer has called in to Connie to report a power outage that was actually just a blown light bulb, but by the third call I was screaming, “Yes, bitch! All the lights are off in my house!”
Step Two: Wait and See What Happens
Over ten hours and ten degrees later, I sat on the couch in the stifling heat of our home and watched as the Georgia Power truck drove up and down our cul-de-sac street without stopping. “Is your power back on now? No? How ‘bout now? Now...?”
Step Three: Bang on it with a Big Stick
When at last the truck stopped at the power box for our street, my curiosity drove me to the window to see what they would try next. After opening the box I heard one of the four guys ask, “What’s the worst that could happen?” I was too hot and tired to care, so I continued to watch as one of the men pulled out what looked like a giant, metal Q-Tip. The other dudes took a step back and we all held our breath as we waited for the technical wizardry to unfold. Much to my surprise, the entire strategy seemed to revolve around banging on something in the box with the giant Q-Tip tool. To my even greater surprise, it actually worked. Suddenly I felt the glorious breeze of the ceiling fan and was blinded by the flood of lights coming on in my home.
Step Three is rapidly becoming my favorite way to fix broken things, especially after the pump on my outdoor fountain began to work like a charm when I took Nathan’s advice and hit it with a rock. I can’t wait to see what my new parenting book thinks about this approach.
Step One: Ask the Obvious
The disgustingly friendly voice recording (I’ll call her Connie) that answered my call to report the outage asked a string of questions and attempted to mimic the response of a real, live person by saying things like, “Oh, I can help you with that.” Connie and I got along great until at the end of her script she asked me to confirm that all the lights were out in my house. I’m sure some idiot customer has called in to Connie to report a power outage that was actually just a blown light bulb, but by the third call I was screaming, “Yes, bitch! All the lights are off in my house!”
Step Two: Wait and See What Happens
Over ten hours and ten degrees later, I sat on the couch in the stifling heat of our home and watched as the Georgia Power truck drove up and down our cul-de-sac street without stopping. “Is your power back on now? No? How ‘bout now? Now...?”
Step Three: Bang on it with a Big Stick
When at last the truck stopped at the power box for our street, my curiosity drove me to the window to see what they would try next. After opening the box I heard one of the four guys ask, “What’s the worst that could happen?” I was too hot and tired to care, so I continued to watch as one of the men pulled out what looked like a giant, metal Q-Tip. The other dudes took a step back and we all held our breath as we waited for the technical wizardry to unfold. Much to my surprise, the entire strategy seemed to revolve around banging on something in the box with the giant Q-Tip tool. To my even greater surprise, it actually worked. Suddenly I felt the glorious breeze of the ceiling fan and was blinded by the flood of lights coming on in my home.
Step Three is rapidly becoming my favorite way to fix broken things, especially after the pump on my outdoor fountain began to work like a charm when I took Nathan’s advice and hit it with a rock. I can’t wait to see what my new parenting book thinks about this approach.
posted by Guest at Wednesday, June 14, 2006
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